20 December 2010

Goodbye, Sydney

Heading to the airport tomorrow at around 8am I think? And should be boarding the plane.. 11am.. according to my dad. I took advantage of my last days here and went to a christmas party with friends. I had the best time ever and there were a total of 15 people attending, so it felt really good to be with all my friends ^^ Then on Sunday I spent a whole day with my boyfriend and at the end of the day, there was a tearful goodbye for a month.. well on my side. hahahaha.

I want to wish everyone an early Merry Christmas and a very Happy New Year! Never forget that Christmas is a day dedicated to the birth of Christ, and that it's a day of giving to others :) I hope you all round off 2010 on a great note - 2010 only comes by once, then its gone, so take advantage of the rest of the year while its still there! :) Im sorry I couldn't say it to all of you individually, but hopefully I'll be able to say this again on the actual day, if i have access to the internet XD

Oh and if you have any requests on what you want from Indonesia, dont hesitate :) So far I've only gotten a request from Selena and Richard =/ I'll just get whatever anyway. haha.

So a little overview on where I'm heading to, this holidays:
- Jakarta
- Bandung
- Purwokerto
- Bali (for the first time) :D

And.. things I'm looking forward to
- being on an aeroplane
- mancing (fishing)
- riding a motorbike/electric scooter
- shopping
- eating out :D
- celebrating christmas and going to church
- NYE fireworks and celebrations
- taking heaps of photos

Not so looking forward to:
- sleeping on the plane
- not being able to understand any conversations without difficulty
- having to always hang around the adults. ALWAYS
- seeing my cousins and auntie without my uncle :'(
- attending his funeral
- the humidity
- having to dress modestly, even if its extremely hot (in respect to the Muslim faith)
- 'roaming' on my phone, hence still being able to use it, but at an expensive charge -.-
- traveling long distance by car (due to my motion sickness)
- the MOSQUITOS :( :(
- getting stomach aches

09 December 2010

Why do we close our eyes when we pray? When we cry? When we dream? Or when we kiss?

Because we know that the most beautiful things in life are not seen, but felt by the heart..

Choose You - Stan Walker

When love starts off, its all peachy
I love you, you love me seems easy
Its like a walk in the park
But the picture of love some try to paint
Its a contrast to the real landscape
But I promise to give you my heart

Some people think that love is just a feeling
So they fall out of love as quickly as they fell in
Some people think that love is just a game
But they the one ones who always seem to end up getting played
Though everything around might change
One thing will still remain..

I will choose to love you
Even though I wanna to stay mad
Even though I wanna get angry
Though it may be easier to walk away
I will choose to stay
I choose you everyday


When I have time, I really want to sign up to use blackberry internet service :D i saw an ad in the phone magazines saying its only $10 a month! im sooo motivated to sign up to it, since its so cheap, plus its unlimited ;D but yeah, im not sure about it because i didnt read the full terms and conditions and you know, it kinda seems to good to be true.. plus it will be the first contract i sign up to, so im still kinda.. deciding. =/

NTS: Ridwan has my hat

Today I worked for 7.5 hours - my longest shift ever XD

I really liked the crew I worked with today because without them, it would be tiring and boring. Especially Ridwan :) He reminds me of.. me. Hes always laughing at everything, and today he was singing and it made me laugh too XD And before I left, Arifin was also singing in indo. looool. i feel like hes my brother already because im so comfortable around him and i can tease him anytime i want :P

I made friends with Ben because we had a break at the same time. Hes nice and friendly :) Didnt have much of a chance to talk with Andri though, but he did talk to me in indo.. thankfully i understood parts of what he said, so i didnt say anything wrong.. hopefully XD

I really liked working with Adeline and especially Noriani too :)

06 December 2010


On this day, I bought a song..
for the first time on iTunes.. it felt good actually, but its expensive - $2.19? At first I thought they were only $1 O.o

Anyway.. the song is actually called For the First Time, by The Script, which is really ironic, because i just said 'for the first time' in my previous sentence.. yeah okay i'll stop now -.-"

05 December 2010

First iTunes Card?

Is it just me, or is it getting harder to download music off the internet.. you know.. the more 'common' way? Limewire is under court and most stuff on mediafire, rapidshare etc have been removed. Anyway tomorrow im off to buy my first ever iTunes card.. im kind of excited for it actually, the songs are going to be complete with album artwork and everything :)

02 December 2010


When I came home from work last night, water leaked into our fuse box and something exploded? Now we have no electricity and Im depending on my last 7% of my laptop to entertain me, when really i could be reading my book. Last night was also a bad time to have gone to work with my phone on 2 bars of power left - the only time i allowed my phone to be on such low battery while i was out. My dad went out today to buy lunch for himself and me, because we cant heat food. I need to wash my hair today, but i cant use the hairdryer. Well this electrician from energy australia just came, and im hoping he'll be able to fix it soon, at least in the next hour or so :(

01 December 2010


NOTE: I seriously did not realise i wrote THIS much, until i posted it and viewed my blog D: so read this 'recount' at your own risk XD

Dresses and suits, food and dancing - hmmm.. well seeing as it was a social event and everyone knows im not very social, it wasnt exactly the best turnout for me XD

I was the first out of my group to arrive at the hotel closely followed by selina, janice and tim. My partner was already there waiting in the lobby but i was still outside when they came, so i stuck with them for 5 mins or so before hesitantly walking in and finding him.. i was scared - would he look good? he told me he would only be wearing a white shirt, and black pants and shoes (from work..) at first when he told me ages ago.. my reaction was.. bad, i have to admit. but i stuck up to it and accepted the fact, thinking it was okay. when he told me he wouldnt be wearing a jacket though, that kinda concerned me a little, because every guy would be wearing one. So.. when i walked in the lobby, he was there and, oh my gosh. i was so surprised. he looked really really good! was wearing a grey shirt instead (because he asked me to choose between purple to match me, or dark grey). it looked completely opposite to what i thought it would look like. at first i thought, 'are those pants and shoes really from work?' well guess what? they werent.

A little background history, my partner had been keeping a secret from me for a month or so. hed always be like, "im in the city doing the secret" or "im paying off the secret" or "i just did the secret in front of your eyes" and you know, id always frustrate me because i was so curious. well he told me that he would eventually tell me on the night of my formal. i came up with many resolutions to what the secret was. they were things like him going overseas forever by the end of this year, him being with another girl, or him buying my late birthday present. and what was the secret? for the whole month, he had been looking for a suit to wear to my semi-formal. that secret to me.. made me so unbelievably happy. was he really willing to do all that just for me? now thinking that he worked long hours and put so much time, money and effort into searching for what to wear, just for me.. he even had to lie to me to hide that secret, but gosh, that was such a good lie. i totally fell for it.

Back to meeting him at the lobby, i gave him the corsage so he could give it to me. that was all i wanted him to do. it didnt matter that we both shared in the cost of it, that i had to pick it up and have it first (and the fact the box was clear!! ==" in the end i had to give in to temptation and look at it). the act of him putting the corsage on my wrist was what made me really happy :) janice was recording us.. i think. hope she doesnt put it up on the internet, but her reading this, she probably would be more motivated to put it up. haha.....

Food? It was so.. umm.. well the presentation looked nice.. but it was all too fancy. the menu.. there were sooo many long complicated words, i got lost. the only thing that tasted normal was the chicken.. the beef was so weird. especially the beef for the entree. it had the texture of salmon D: the beef for main looked good but i reluctantly swapped with selena for chicken. was glad i did, it tasted okay. the beef looked rare when i saw the inside was red. as to how rare it was, dunno. looked pretty rare. haha. the cake for dessert was reallyyyy good. x)

Dancing. dont want to go there. i DONT dance =/ dancing was the main activity actually, which was a major dislike for me. i did look forward to slow dancing though. and being one of joy's many slow dance partners XD well guess what? it didnt happen :( the DJ was okay, he put on good songs but at times the techniques used made the song sound like it was disfunctioning. you know, when it freezes up and repeats the same 1 second of the song over and over again? he prob did that on purpose? but it sounded like it went for too long, that i actually wondered if it actually wasnt on purpose.

It seems like my night is going down with each paragraph right? well i would talk about how i didnt like the photos either, but nah :L instead i'll talk about being with the person i love the most - my boyfriend :) we did take heaps of photos together (in fact my mum's camera only has photos of us.. oh, and food.. awkward.. because my mum went through them an hour ago). we had a professional photo together as well. but i look bad, and he looks good :(

When the night ended i couldnt say a proper thankyou and goodbye to the others and especially my partner. i wish i couldve, but my dad had to come pick me up, and a hug and kiss wouldve made him go uneasy.. my dad actually offered him a ride though, and i wish he couldve accepted because taxis are expensive and i wanted to be with him a while longer.. AND i wanted him to get to know my dad more. but oh well.

In terms of being with my boyfriend at a semi-formal, it was the best night ever. I was so happy being him. I laughed a lot with him, danced, took photos, found out he wanted to look his best for me. That was enough to make my day. Well, night actually. Without him, i would be like i always am - just listening to conversations, trying to blend in with the crowd. I would feel so anti-social, like i always am. haha. Having someone who set his attention on me in a crowd full of beautifully dressed people.. is one of the best feelings ever <3

27 November 2010

The most beautiful feeling is to see the person you love smiling, And it's even more beautiful to know that you are the reason behind it.

"Pile your troubles on God's shoulders - he'll carry your load, he'll help you out. He'll never let good people topple into ruin."

- Psalm 55:22

"Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares about you"
- 1 Peter 5:7

"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own"
- Matthew 6:34

Some bible quotes that have given me hope all these years. Its only now that I really need them to guide me at the moment, when everything seems to be falling apart. In the end, they make me smile :)

26 November 2010

Senior Year

Today was my last day of being a junior, next year will be my final last two years of high school as a senior :) Basically had a graduation mass and my mum came! she made my day because she said she'd try her hardest to come. I love you :) Cant believe im on holidays now, it seemed too fast :O this is my last holidays ever. next year is study, study, study and much less going out and definitely less socialising.

Today I bought my formal shoes - they look nice, and they dont even feel like heels, but its so uncomfortable, even just putting it on, because its crammed a little in the front =/ my mum seemed really determined to buy it though, seeing as my semi-formal is just 4 days away. and seeing as i really couldnt be bothered searching again for shoes on sunday, i agreed to it.

18 November 2010

I want to destroy my online life (specifically my phone)

What I really want to do is throw my phone onto the wall. Im so freaking tired of waiting. The phone has made me go depressed on my side of the relationship. We barely see each other, compared to when we used to see each other everyday. Maybe we both have resorted to texting each other to keep each other company instead of actually SEEING each other. Because of my phone, i get depressed every time i get short replies, long-time-to-reply replies, no i-love-you return replies or.. no reply at ALL. it really makes me sad. Im so glad hes different in real life.

Harry Potter 7

Part 1 is out today!

Please don't make me wait.

i cant pretend everything is alright right now, because it isn't.
its getting harder to fake a smile..

oh and today i went with connie, kirsty and mim to the city to volunteer to donate blood. when we arrived there, we were told our school hadn't booked us in. fail. so in the end we had to head back home. we'll all have to wait until next year then.

i headed to work afterwards because connie reminded me that i had to get my laptop and school blazer that i left at work.

12 November 2010


I always experience this every year or so, looking out the airplane window. Its really beautiful to see from a high view :)

Work is so unfair T___T

So tomorrow is Evie's semi-formal party and originally i couldnt go because i had work from 6-10pm but then my friend asked if she could get a lift to the party, because she has no other way.
I feel bad because:
1. Its my friends bday party
2. If i dont go, my friend wont be able to go

This afternoon i went to cancel my shift, and my manager was there so she wasnt exactly the perfect person to ask if i can cancel my shift, because as i expected, she pressures me by giving me that suspicious tone, and also asked me to replace it with another shift - and it ALWAYS happens to be a really unreasonable shift, and i cant say no :( and this 'unreasonable' shift happens to be on a sunday (a holy day) and 2-10pm!! ive NEVER worked 2-10 (7.5 hours) so im pretty much going to collapse from exhaustion on that day x.x
I go outside with the roster and start signing all my shifts and i notice on saturday, someone has already replaced me!! AHHH all that excuse for nothing :( if i just came to say i wanted to check my shifts, i couldve said no to that sunday shift D: anyway, i decided to work all of next week from monday to thursday. and on saturday..

08 November 2010

Tumblr Reblog

What could be the sweetest thing you could ever witness on earth?
Watching the one you love, whispering your name while they are sleeping


just another day missing you..
and your smile
and your hug
and your voice


I know how every senior above my year is going "YOU'LL BE FINE"
but no, im NOT fine, im freaking out so much! I mean, yeah, I did study quite a bit, especially in science. but the thing is, im worst in maths and i didnt study for maths. because seriously, i did try and as soon as i went on a maths online tutorial, i just freaked out more, so i closed the page and never looked at it again.

the things i do these days..

06 November 2010

Wanna take you with me..

Every holiday its the same.. go to Indonesia and always stick to my mum and dad and sis with no one else to talk to because no one can understand english :'( always so lonely.. hiks.. I wish I had friends that I could meet up with.. then I would enjoy my holidays.. I always wanted to watch a movie, eat out and ride electric scooter with friends overseas.. In fact, I wouldnt mind taking my boyfriend overseas with me - its only $1660.56 ^^ But honestly, my parents would kill me if i freely spent that much for someone :(

Meeting the parents

Hillsong Live Album Recording tomorrow :D The posters on it, are all around Kingsford on telephone poles - I never knew they wanted to promote it like that :L

Speaking of it, Richard is going with me and my mum. Nervous? Definitely. But its good for my parents (well, my mum at least..) to get to know my partner to the formal beforehand ^^ First time ive ever had my boyfriend meet one of my parents. Dont really know what to expect, but its my mum, and we had a conversation about this before so.. it should be okay-ish? :) Maybe a little awkward though.. haha.

My dad brought up the topic of my formal partner last night.. didnt turn out good, as I expected. I think most fathers all like that - scared of their daughter getting to know the 'opposite sex' and always concerned about the kinds of things we do with them - even hugging causes my dad to give me this full-blown lecture.. but I guess thats life. When the time comes, I pray my dad eventually approves of me having a boyfriend XD

My sister's scary eating habits..

Sometimes it takes another sibling to realise how bad someone's lifestyle is. Seeing my sister eating chips first thing in the morning really scares me. Shes also constantly eating lollies throughout the day. I guess I was like that when I was her age, and now I know why parents get concerned seeing their child eating those types of food..

Supermarket, Major Retail or Local Supermarket?

I want to quit working in fast food and move to somewhere like coles, target or IGA. Maybe I'll try apply for IGA in kingsford first, then move on to the bigger stores in easties if i dont get in?

05 November 2010


School shoes
Formal shoes
Game for sister
BB internet service
Pencil case
Coloured papermate pens

And when I go overseas:

School stationary

03 November 2010

Goodbye for a day and a half x

My sister is going on camp for the first time tomorrow. Shes leaving at 6am in the morning. Hoping she stays safe but has heaps of fun. Surely the silence will kind of start to annoy me tomorrow.. haha.. Oh well. Will miss you heaps jess x

01 November 2010

3 more days :D

Scared :(

First negative feeling as soon as I leave my house: insecurity.
Theres this old asian man across my road that is really scaring me because hes always looking in the direction of my house and his gaze is always following me.. and the first few days i passed him, he looked me up and down and wouldnt break off his gaze :'( Please, please dont get worse..

27 October 2010


How do I make my blog on private? Its not that I want to block out certain friends, I just want to keep it out of the eyes of people I dont know (the public). Umm.. should I make it private, then do that 'send an email to everyone who you authorise to read your blog'? but then EVERYONE knows my blog x.x I wish there was an easier way.. Unless I create a new blog and put the link up on msn? Facebook has way too many connections.

26 October 2010


How much I'd give just to see you even for a second ><

My love for you

Come rain or shine, whether im too sick to get up or just have a common cold, if its early in the morning or late at night, even if I have tons of school things to focus on, or am I really sleepy, I want to find ways to see you if you want me to, even if its just to see you for a minute or two. NO questions asked. I want to be there when you need me most.

25 October 2010

I want..

you to talk to me like you would with any close friend of yours.. and more. if thats not too much to ask :) if only i wasnt naturally quiet, people would find it easier to talk to me :(


Last night, I had a strange dream about being in a plane that failed to take off. I think it was because it wasnt going fast enough and the lane was too short. We somehow took the plane back to starting position and tried launching several times. Then I think the last time, we actually used roads for launching and.. it was really weird.

I wonder why I dreamt of that?

23 October 2010

3 More Days

I cant believe its so soon. Ive been so occupied with school work, hanging out with friends and all that, that I didnt realise I would turn 16 in less than a week. When I was young, I used to count down a whole month to my birthday but not this time XD

Not to mention this birthday will be very.. um.. stressful. Ive probably got no time to celebrate because I have 2 exams and an assignment due, and coincidentally, they're placed to be due day after day after my birthday -__- i.e. I'll be studying hardcore on my birthday.. greaaaat :(

Hmm.. in terms of presents, I dont really want anything specific.. I did originally want a Country Road bag but I really dont mind anything because there's nothing top priority for me.

Today my mum and I negotiated at the 3 store in Kingsford and I can actually upgrade my phone to Blackberry without waiting 2 months for my contract to end :D we're going to get it on wednesday. But that means im getting a Blackberry Curve, not the Storm touch that i really wanted =/ oh well.

22 October 2010

そばにいるね I'm By Your Side

Even now, I continue to think of you
No matter how much we move,
I'm by your side baby, always
Regardless of how we are separated, you are in my heart
But, being without you is so lonely
So baby please, just hurry back home

Baby boy, I'm right here and I'm not going to leave
You know that I love you, so you don't have to worry
No matter the distance,
this heart is not going to change
Don't you understand what I'm saying?
I am waiting for you

Although we can't return the time that has passed,
You are still here for me, and dear to me
Although I understand that the distance with you is so far and that you are so busy,
Sometimes I wanted to run away
But whether my eyes were opened, or I was sleeping,
I wasn't able to leave you
When I remembered you, I cried

Inside that album, I obtain all my memories
Day after day, I see it and, for a moment, I feel your love
And now I continue to wait for your call
And you call my cell phone at the last moment before I fall asleep
(I want to hold you and be with you)
I won't go anywhere, I'm right here
But I want hope to be with you
Hey, you understand, right?
I am waiting

- 青山 テルマ


I have a REALLY strong feeling that keeps nagging me.. that feeling is that something bad is going to happen tonight..
So i have a chinese speech due tomorrow about '我的電腦' and i have absolutely NO idea what to write .__. Any suggestions?

19 October 2010


Do you remember the last time i blogged about my science trial school cert and said im most likely to fail the question i thought id be best at - the biology one on DNA? Today i got the exam back and got 5/5 for that question.. what the heck -__-"

Day 5: A photo of the item you last purchased

Like, really purchased? Not food kind of purchases? Uhh.. wow i really dont remember.. Probably a bus ticket? ahaha nah thats too.. basic. Oh gosh, im going to skip this one, i dont remember besides food purchases :S

18 October 2010


At work some fight came on about this asian couple having a pet with them while they were eating and some cheeky random decided to make a big scene out of it and cause trouble and all that. In the end wawan had to politely tell them to leave because they weren't allowed pets. That random guy pushed it too far when he got what he wanted (the couple to leave) and from what i heard from Adam, attempted to put ketchup all over the dog but it ended up on the guy i think. It was pretty big, there was a lot of shoving, trying to get at each other and shouting and wawan had to try get between them and that. I gotta admit, the girl was just as tough, forceful and angry as the guy was. It really scared me that day, but yeah, you know. The general rule is that pets arent allowed in places where people eat, so I guess that random did have a point to prove. But yeah.. still.. a little shaken about it all

Day 4: A song to match your mood

Simple Love - Jay Chou

17 October 2010


..what ive been waiting for.

Today I came home to find a weight scale in my room that I asked my mum to buy today. My weight is..


And my BMI is 17.0 (Height = 157cm)
Underweight = >18.5
Not too bad.. I only seem slightly underweight right? ^^

I dont know why, but I kept messing with the accuracy by trying to get the starting point EXACTLY at zero, but its really hard. If you see it from different views and angles.. you get different results.. -__-

Well anyway, if im really determined to do the blood drive, i need to gain at least 6-8kg in about a month or less. Is that possible? Today I couldnt even finish half a plate of combination chow mein. This aim is waaaay more harder than i thought.

Im going to start by just eating what I normally eat everyday, and constantly check my weight to see if im losing weight, staying the same, or gaining weight. If im gaining weight then yay! i just continue eating what i usually eat then ^^


Today my boyfriend and I wore clothes that were so identical to each others, that it scared me so much. It really caught me off guard, because it was a pure coincidence - we never exchanged words on what we were going to wear that day. On the brighter side, it was really nice because we matched each other :)

14 October 2010

*Jumping up and down in excitement* :D

So on June 2010, I wrote a letter to the Distant Worlds: Music from Final Fantasy saying that it would be nice if they performed in Sydney, Australia sometime, because I'm a fan of the music and the whole orchestra and it inspires me and all that. I checked all the concert dates and from what ive seen, they only perform around Japan and America =/

And today I checked my inbox and found a response from them from last month! :D and.. THEY'RE PERFORMING IN SYDNEY NEXT YEAR!!!!!!! AAAAAAHHH I AM SO HAPPY! :D and apparently Nobuo Uematsu is going to attend it as well!!

I went to try get seating arrangements and you can literally choose where you want to sit out of the hundreds of seats available :L The ones that were coloured meant they were already taken and.. wow, a lot of them are already taken O.o

anyway.. im sooooooo going XD Maybe I'll get the good tickets like the A reserve or B reserve one at $70-$99 range. Cheapest one is Reserve C at $35 but nah, I want good seats :P

13 October 2010

Distance :(

Cant imagine what it would be like not seeing you for a month when I go overseas during holidays..

11 October 2010


I cant believe I would do such a thing now that I think about it..


Self-talk: "Shame on you, you will never be a biologist now" -__-
So today, I had a mind blank on a biology question. Yup, that one on DNA and the environment.. How could I.. after spending all my spare time reading a book ALL ABOUT IT. Biology is meant to be a subject I want to be strong in, not have mind blanks in :(

08 October 2010

New phone on my birthday

Every 2 years is when i normally get a new phone, and so today, a new phone was the main topic of the conversation with my mum today.

At first i had 3 choices - LG mini, Nokia X6 and Nokia N97 mini. yup, i somehow gave up on the LG new chocolate slide. and i had to stick to a $29 cap anyway. then came the blackberry bold which i really wanted, but it was on the $39 cap. i had to resort to the blackberry curve which didnt look as nice, but i wanted more than the other 3 phones i mentioned.. and lastly, came the blackberry storm 9700 - on the $29 cap + touchscreen. the difference was that it was the older version released in 2008 i think? no wonder its so cheap now. the blackberry storm 2 would be much better because its the latest version, but umm.. you know.. its expensive. haha

so anyway, blackberry storm 1 it is :D

07 October 2010

Day 2: Your favourite photo of your best friend

I wouldnt say I have a best friend, but as for close friend(s), here they are (by the way, sorry for taking your photo and posting it up elsewhere, tell me if you want me to change it or have it removed all together D: )





05 October 2010

Day 1: A photo of something you ate today

Okay im officially starting my 10 day challenge now :D

Today I ate at Pepper Lunch for the first time ^^ Had a chicken and hamburger combo?
This isnt my picture and this even isnt what i ate, but im too lazy.. ==" so.. heres a picture from the internet?

Blood test

Tomorrow im going for a blood test - personal decision by me to see if anything is wrong or something like that. The main reason is diabetes, and i doubt i have it, but i dont know, apparently its common? And apparently im also more prone to it because of my diet lacking in this and that :(

02 October 2010

School Performance

[ ] Gotten detention.
[ ] Gotten your phone taken away in class.
[ ] Gotten suspended.
[ ] Gotten caught chewing gum.
[ ] Gotten caught cheating on a test.

Total: 0

[ ] Arrived late to class more than 5 times.
[x] Didn't do homework over 5 times.
[ ] Turned at least 3 projects in late.
[x] Missed school 'cause you felt like it.
[ ] Laughed so loud you got kicked out of class.

Total so far: 2

[ ] Got your mom/dad etc. to get you out of school.
[x] Texted people during class.
[x] Passed notes.
[x] Threw stuff across the room.
[x] Laughed at the teacher.

Total so far: 6

[ ] Pulled down the fire alarm
[x] Went on myspace, facebook, xanga, hotmail etc. on the computer at school.
[x] Took pictures during school hours.
[x]Called someone during school hours.
[x] Listened to an iPod, cd, etc. during class.

Total so far: 10

[ ] Threw something at the teacher.
[x] Went outside the classroom without permission.
[x] Broke the dress code.
[ ] Failed a class.
[x] Ate food during class.

Total so far: 13

[ ] Gotten a call from school...
[ ] Couldn't go on a field trip cause you behaved badly.
[x] Didn't take your stuff to school.
[ ] Gotten a detention and didn't go.
[ ] Stuck up your middle finger at a teacher when they were not looking.
[ ] Swore during class loud enough so the teacher could hear.

Total so far: 14

[x] Faked your parents signature.
[x] Slept in class.
[ ] Cursed at a teacher to their face.
[x] Copied homework

Total: 14
Multiply by 3: 42%

28 September 2010

10 Day Challenge

Day 1: A photo of something you ate today
Day 2: Your favourite photo of your best friend
Day 3: A photo of an animal you'd love to keep as your pet
Day 4: A song to match your mood
Day 5: A photo of the item you last purchased
Day 6: A photo of your favourite place to eat
Day 7: Your favourite musician and why?
Day 8: Something you don't leave the house without
Day 9: Your skin care regime
Day 10: What's in your bag?

Day 14, 15, 16, 17;

I give up, this is too long so I'm going to quit this challenge and find new shorter ones -__-

27 September 2010

Trial SC Maths

I'm failing maths and getting 'average' marks as usual :(
Correct: 40%
Wrong: 45%
Unattempted: 15% (meaning I either didnt understand it, or didnt have time for it)

I did get 100% once for science though :D

26 September 2010

Christmas Holidays

So it turns out I'm going back to Indonesia next holidays, instead of my usual 'once-every-two-years' thing. Dont know if im going next year or not, but I kind of dont want to go this year. For one, I will have to leave my boyfriend behind for Christmas and New Years Eve celebrations :( I was so looking forward to spending time with him on those two days.. Not mention, I dont like the thought of having to spend hot days with mosquitos, having to wear very modest clothes. Then the trip to Purwokerto.. Have to spend 7-8 hours on the train -__- Did I also mention, staying at my cousin's house would be very awkward? Tante, Adit and Andre might not even talk much because of what happened recently.. and to think that everyone except my dad seems to be intruding on their hospitality at this certain time =/

On the positive side, my anticipation to go is gradually rising because I get to see my cousins, go shopping a little, and feel like a tourist all over again, going crazy over food, ads and those weird dramas on TV, and going shopping in Indonesian malls (i know, i AM weird).

Day 13; Somewhere you'd like to move or visit

I'd like to stay in Sydney, for one. As for whereabouts in Sydney, maybe Kingsford is fine with me already, because I like the feeling of being comfortable with my surroundings, plus it would be good if i got into UNSW because i can just walk. Hmm.. but UTS doesnt sound bad either. I passed this huge yellow UTS sign in the city and interior design and sciences were on the list of choices available.. not too bad ^^

Places I'd like to visit.. so many, and i think i already listed them down in a previous blog post, but pretty much Indonesia, Japan, Taiwan, France, Italy, Rome and maybe Queensland (i feel like im the only person who hasnt gone to the Great Barrier Reef..)

25 September 2010

Day 12; Bullet your whole day

  • Woke up
  • Took out retainer
  • Had breakfast
  • Read a magazine
  • Brushed teeth
  • Showered
  • Put contacts in
  • Texting
  • Internet
  • Lunch
  • School certificate practise
  • Internet
  • Texting
  • On the phone
And thats it for now :D

Dearest - Ayumi Hamasaki

24 September 2010

Day 11; Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up

1. All I Need Is You - Hillsong United
2. 酸甜 - S.H.E
3. Promise In The Dark - Keri Hilson
4. The Technicolour Phase - Owl City
5. 理想情人 - Rainie Yang
6. Not Okay - Varsity
7. 守護星 - Fahrenheit
8. 我对不起我 - Hebe
9. Biarkan Aku Jatuh Cinta - ST12
10. Don't Go Away - BY2

23 September 2010

Day 10; Discuss your first love and first kiss

This post is so embarrassing -__-"

Hmm.. my first love would probably be Tingwu? I had a hard time coping when we broke up and it took me over a year to get over it. I kept on claiming I moved on, but his constant statuses on other girls just brought about being annoyed and angry at him. This was back in 2008 I think? I learnt soooo much from the relationship though. At that time I was a really clingy person, and always dressed like a street dancer. Like, never feminine. We always had study dates and spent most weekdays in the afternoon at the library. We only went out once to watch a movie and I had to go home straight away. We never kissed? Oh, and I dont think we even held hands. Ever .___. We were together for nearly 2 months, but it ended a few days before our anniversary. I couldnt stand to leave him before 2 months. I could tell something was wrong a few days before we ended. I remember he had work experience near my house and we talked for what seemed like an hour. When he left to go back inside, he didnt say a proper goodbye, so i knew something was wrong. Anyway.. in the end he said he would rather be my friend, and plus he had studies to concentrate on. Hmm.. thats about it I think ^^ Nowadays we're friends and talk normally. I dont feel uncomfortable talking to him anymore so its all good :)

My first kiss was quite recent and it was with my ex. It was really awkward and it didnt last long. It was short but nice. But so 'out of time' if you get what I mean? We kinda.. didnt kiss at the same time. That was my first and last kiss with him ever.

22 September 2010

I dont like it when people use his name for the wrong purpose

..seriously, its so immature :(

Day 9; How you hope your future will be like

This is really similar to the one in ten years time but anyway.. O.o

Hmm.. maybe a leading interior designer, break-through-in-cancer kind of researcher or my own business in professional wedding photography? So far im not really dreaming big, and absolutely unsure of what i want to be..

Married, not sure if i want children or not. Living in a nice house, dont know which area yet and if it will be in Australia or overseas.

Hopefully in the future i will be financially stable, maybe even wealthy if i can aim that high.

The future is still a long way away, I have time to think about it later right?

20 September 2010

Day 8; A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life

I dont really remember, but I tend to feel best when im outdoors, the sun is warm and shining and I get to be in the middle of it all just lying back in the grass and enjoying nature. I know, this sounds so stereotypical, but I really do feel like everything is good when the environment around me is nice :)

Day 7; Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality

The above link is what I'm going to write about, so read before going on :)

As someone who doesnt believe in star signs, it describes me in many ways, but really, it can perfectly describe people in different situations and at different times cant it?

Qualities I agree with: Emotional, demanding -> loyal, silent, obsessive
Qualities I disagree with: Likes competition, determined, committed, eyes = strongest feature, constantly seeking hurt

18 September 2010

Day 6; 30 interesting facts about yourself

1. Chinese blood, Indonesian background
2. Can only speak English fluently
3. Ive been to Indonesia, New Zealand, Melbourne, Canberra, Thailand
4. First guy I liked was in year 2 and the guy was 3 years above me?
5. Travel sick easily (except for planes + trains)
6. Very easy to influence and change the view of
7. Underweight and unhappy, but can only dream of having the motivation to gain weight
8. Left eye: -4.25 and right eye: -4.oo
9. Scared of mosquitos that cant be seen at night, but can be heard
10. Can become full just from a cup of drink
11. Has spend literally a whole day on the computer countless times
12. Absolutely hates durian (both smell and taste)
13. Doesnt remember dates easily
14. Washes her hair once every two days
15. Maths is my worst and most hated subject right now
16. I have gone to $500 on my phone bill once
17. Can be quite spoilt
18. Buying new clothes boosts my self esteem
19. I have highlights in my hair
20. Has been in more than 4 relationships
21. Sometimes feels uncomfortable at church
22. Always leaves homework and assignments to the last minute
23. Has made 600+ paper cranes. Maybe 1000, but I always give jars of them away, so it subtracts.
24. Is an Australian/Indonesian citizen
25. Still counts on her fingers
26. Socially awkward
27. Loses balance just from standing on a flat surface
28. Gives up easily
29. Karate yellow belt 2
30. Has had 3 pet rabbits, 3 siamese fighting fish, 3 hermit crabs

Day 5; A time you thought about ending your own life

When I'm running low on self esteem or am seriously depressed, this my main thought. The thing is, God is always there when I need Him. He may seem nearly invisible at that time, but He's never too late.

16 September 2010

S.H.E Concert tomorrow! :D

Will be my first concert ever, cant wait ^^

Day 4; Your views on religion

First of all, I dont really like the word religion, faith is better ^^
Im a Pentecostal Christian, but I respect all those ancient philosophers such as Confucius and Budda - they have a great view on life, but you know, sometimes their belief clashes with mines. My God is what I live for, without Him, I wouldnt have a purpose in life, or have hope for the future. He's what stops me from hurting certain people, doing certain wrong things and all that. He is what makes me a better person. He there for me, when I need Him most, whenever I am lonely or think I am alone in this world, I just turn to Him.

What I think is that religion shouldn't be compulsory 'subject' in schools because students take it the wrong way and think they are 'brainwashed' or 'forced' into religion. I like how theres the subject, 'studies of religion' though, where you get to explore all different faiths :) I understand sometimes we're forced into believing something from our parents, because they believe it is the best for us, and they dont want our lives to turn bad or anything. But we should be free to choose for ourselves. Also, people are always misinterpreting religions and faiths. We need to be more open about it.

15 September 2010

Upcoming Shifts

For people to know, like Selena, Janice and Connie who want to know when I can catch the bus XD

18 Sat: 6 - 10pm
20 Mon: 4 - 10pm
21 Tue: 4 - 9pm (cancelled)
22 Wed: unsure
24 Fri: 4 - 10pm (cancelled)
25 Sat: 6 - 10pm
27 Mon: 4 - 10pm
28 Tue: 4 - 9pm
29 Wed: 4 - 9pm
30 Thurs: 11am - 4pm
1 Fri: 4 - 9pm (need to cancel)
2 Sat: 6 - 10pm
4 Mon: 3 - 10pm

im working nearly every single day. AND straight after the term finishes, SCHOOL CERTIFICATE TRIALS first day back at school T__T

Day 3; Your views on drugs and alcohol

I always refer to these two things as 'artificial happiness'.
Pretty self explanatory, eventually people live on these things and resort to them whenever they feel depressed or unhappy. Dont take the easy way out, guys.

My views? Hmm.. its hard. Im not against alcohol in moderate amounts and on special occasions - thats okay. Drugs are something i never want to encounter in my life. If being on drugs was like the feeling I got from strobe lights at my friday night youth, then omgsh. DEFINITELY not drugs. You dont know how dizzy I got from them. Everyone didnt seem real because all i could see was the 'lagged' motion. My head was hurting, I wanted to close my eyes. It was horrible. I bet thats what drugs feel like.

Anyhow, Im against drugs. Semi-against alcohol, depending on the situation.

14 September 2010

Day 2; Where you'd like to be in 10 years

To reach this goal in 10 years is impossible but my ideal life in that time would be:

Study at university
Successful career in interior or commercial/industrial design, medical science or photography
Participate in Hillsong Creative Worship team
Live in an apartment with my boyfriend
Maybe get married (maybe its too early for that ^^")
Be able to drive
Travel overseas to Japan, France, Rome, Taiwan and Indonesia (of course)

Why do i deserve to be with someone so pure in heart?

I ask myself that question every day.
People like me, with so many flaws, so many mistakes..
Im sooooo blessed to have you in my life. I would never take your love for granted.


Oh, and one more thing

Communication is one of the keys to a sucessful relationship.
Dont ask me why this came out all of a sudden, but I've noticed with my past that a lack of communication leads to someone on one side thinking something is wrong. You ignore them. Just keep being upset with them without saying anything. Obviously assumptions come out. "Has he/she forgotten about me? Moved on?" Eventually these negative thoughts domineer our previous happy ones. And we're left with hurt.

Wedding Dress - Taeyang

I have a bad feeling, one day this song will be of relevance to me. Not saying I'm Taeyang in this situation. You know. Someone else maybe.

You know what?

My thoughts for you, should only be for you. Its true I want to share with the whole wide world that you're special. But there are times when I wish I could speak those words to you, and only you. Because out there, there are people that will use my words, manipulate it and turn it against us. Like for example, "do you really know what forever means?" Girl, all we know is that it is only God that is the Alpha and the Omega. Beginning and the end. Really, to be honest, if theres an end, theres no forever is there? Would be nice to know what forever feels like though.

From this moment on, thats it. I think ive let everyone in on us. And now, from this time on, its only for us, between us. I say, make a private blog for those time we cant speak what we want to say? :)

The difference between you and them?

I can picture a future with you.
You're different. You're what a real relationship is for. Trust. Honesty. Love. Hope. Perseverance. Life is a gift from God that is too amazing to be experienced alone right? I want to walk this journey with you. Those rocks and boulders that we will experience sooner than we expect, will be tests against my love for you. I won't back down so easily.

13 September 2010

She's reading this?

I once heard a quote saying something along the lines of 'when you love someone, you put their happiness in front of yours.'

Day 1; Your current relationship

Everything is going perfect so far. Just a bit of a worry about my parents, but other than that, I find no fault in our relationship. Hes good for me and I couldn't ask for anything more.

12 September 2010

The big question

Today you asked me.. "why do you love me?"
Honestly, I struggled with that question for a while. It kind of played around on my mind - its a difficult question because theres so many reasons why, but i dont know which reason stood out the most. Is it your ability to make me smile? To make me a better person? No, those are all reasons that benefit only me. What about you? What is it uniquely about you? I cant really answer that. But this leads me to one answer: you're all about people. You are really caring, friendly, compassionate and a 'loving life' kind of person. The kind of relationship you have with God and people is really what attracts me to you. No kidding, I'm not trying to flatter you just because I talk about Him. To be with someone so God-driven.. you've definitely got me interested. I want you in my life.

Hope this answered your question, love :)


What was amazing about today was.. that I was able to keep my eyes on you for longer :)

Ashley Evans

An amazing guest speaker at church today ^^

11 September 2010

Prayers to my dad's brother / cousin's dad who passed away from a stroke yesterday morning. I can't even imagine how my cousins and aunty would feel. I visit them every two years and to think that the next time i visit, the entire household will feel.. different. I might be going to back to Indonesia at the end of this year, but just with my dad. I can choose not to though. But.. I don't know, its also really hard to imagine that he is no longer here in this world. I miss him. We weren't exactly the closest, but he did mean something. All I will ever know is that it must be difficult to live without a father figure. And for a sibling to pass away.

30 Day Challenge?

Day 01 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.
Day 02 - Where you’d like to be in 10 years.
Day 03 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.
Day 04 - Your views on religion.
Day 05 - A time you thought about ending your own life.
Day 06 - Write 30 interesting facts about yourself.
Day 07 - Your zodiac sign and if you think it fits your personality.
Day 08 - A moment you felt the most satisfied with your life.
Day 09 - How you hope your future will be like.
Day 10 - Discuss your first love and first kiss.
Day 11 - Put your ipod on shuffle and write 10 songs that pop up.
Day 12 - Bullet your whole day.
Day 13 - Somewhere you’d like to move or visit.
Day 14 - Your earliest memory.
Day 15 - Your favorite tumblrs.
Day 16 - Your views on mainstream music.
Day 17 - Your highs and lows of this past year.
Day 18 - Your beliefs.
Day 19 - Disrespecting your parents.
Day 20 - How important you think education is.
Day 21 - One of your favorite shows.
Day 22 - How have you changed in the past 2 years?
Day 23 - Give pictures of 5 guys who are famous who you find attractive.
Day 24 - Your favorite movie and what it’s about.
Day 25 - Someone who fascinates you and why.
Day 26 - What kind of person attracts you.
Day 27 - A problem that you have had.
Day 28 - Something that you miss.
Day 29 - Goals for the next 30 days.
Day 30 - Your highs and lows of this month.

11 September 2010

Letter to my one and only love

I love you so much.
I want the whole world to know that my heart will be forever yours.
Yes, forever is a strong word. I've never used that word in any of my relationships because then I know the meaning would be lost. Its hard to think that I think about you so much already, since we've only been together for exactly a week. But God gives me faith that this kind of love is true and right. Over 7 days and 24 hours, you have already impacted my life so much. You brought me closer to God. You got me smiling more and more each day. To be able to stand by the side of someone who is imperfectly perfect everyday makes me feel beautiful and loved.

Richard, you are my one and only, for the present and future to come.

Tonight :D

I get to work with you for 4-5 hours ^^

08 September 2010

I dread goodbyes..

Cant i just keep you forever?


Something is seriously wrong with "him"
Usually get only gets pissed off from time to time, but just then, he came out of bedroom in the morning, already with that annoyed attitude. HES ALWAYS LIKE THAT! Freaking slamming the door, sighing loudly all the time, handling stuff rougher ==" Far out, its annoying me too..

07 September 2010

I miss you already, Richard :(

Day Ten; One Confession

I think this is one day late but hmm.. i really cant think of a confession.
Oh, guys who wear nice perfume? I cant resist them.
Yes, I am being a little biased here.. okay, maybe too much ^^"

Our God is Love

This is love: Jesus came and died, and He gave His life for us.
Today he cooked food for me :D

05 September 2010


my boyfriend came over at night just to drop some food for me.. made my day :)

Day Nine; Two smileys that describe your life right now

and ^^

A reblog of a private post from my tumblr :)


I love..

How you waited 1 hour and 15 minutes for me during work

How you said you would cook for me

How you pulled me close to you

..And how you guided my hand around your waist

How you offered me your clothes when I was cold

How you showed me on your phone that you would could know whenever I was online

How you didnt fail to show your affections through actions.. and didn’t care that I seemed uncomfortable with it, or attempted to move away from it

How you told me you missed your family overseas

How you listened to my favourite song with me

How you kissed me indirectly

How you walked me home in the rain

How you kept me warm

How you wanted to catch a bus with me instead of drive me home

How you walked me to the corner, put your hand against the wall behind me, looked me straight in the eye and asked me to be your girlfriend

How you think our 4 year age difference doesnt matter

How I listed nearly ALL my weaknesses and faults, and you didnt seem to care

How I rejected you but you seemed to understand and still managed to smile

And even on Monday..

How you drew for me over and over again

How you managed to make me laugh and smile

How you made plans for us to meet overseas

How you really wanted to hear my voice, even if you knew I hated calling

How you texted me all throughout the afternoon, into the night, late night and early morning

04 September 2010

Richard & Emily

est. 040910
forever yours :)

Day Eight; Three turn ons

A great smile
A love for God, life and people

Day Seven; Four turn offs

Oh crap, I think I forgot to do this one yesterday. I forgot actually. I have no idea where I'm up to but I'll just post yesterday's and today's one just to be safe.


03 September 2010

Reblogged From Joy's Tumblr :)

S**** about to get personal, ready?
No, I was dared to do this T__T

Does anyone not like you at the moment?
I hope not..

Will the last person you kissed be the next person you kiss?
Doubt it..

When you say you don’t care do you mean it?
Really depends on the situation I guess.

Do you hate it when people smoke around you?
Of course - it's unattractive and unhealthy. And definitely not cool.

Are promises important to you?
Yes. But they always end up broken. I cherish the ones that are kept though

Do you have a reason to smile right now?
Half yes, half no

Has anyone put their arms around you in the past 5 days?

Do you hate being home alone?
Sometimes I absolutely hate it, other times I don't mind it

If the person you have feelings for started smoking, what would you do?
I'd want to confront them, but I'd be too scared to. Maybe start becoming distant or something.

Can you last in a relationship for 6 months?
No.. =(

Think back in April, how was your life then?
Hmm.. I really don't remember.. Probably less stressful than it is now, because of the pressures of the upcoming SC exam, year 11 enrollment, subject selection, interviews etc.

Has anything upset you in the last week?
Yes. Took someone from work too seriously and got really offended. Thought they didn't want to be my friend anymore, but as I said, I took it too seriously =/

Who was the last person you texted before bed last night?
Richard :D

Where is your biological mother right now?
Sleeping? Haha

Anyone you’re giving up on?
There was no one to begin with

Would you be more likely to fail Science or Math?
200% sure that it would be maths. DEFINITELY MATHS. always failed, always will. i dont like maths :(

Have you kissed one person more than 20 times in ‘10?

If someone liked you right now, would you want them to tell you?
Hmm.. depends who it is?

What are you listening to?
Well I WAS listening to "Hello, Again" by a Japanese singer. The MV made me cry so much.

Anyone you were good friends with, that you no longer get along with?

Well I wouldn't say I don't get along with them, but just no longer talk to them. They would be people like primary school friends etc.

If your best friend said they were running away, what would you do?

What, like right now? I would be speechless, because they seemed okay up until now. I'd hug her and never let her go so she doesn't run away. heheheh >:D

Have you ever had a best friend who was of the opposite sex?
Haha, of course. Timmy =D He's literally like a brother to me.

Are you addicted to cigarettes?
In your dreams. Actually not in your dreams, just NO altogether. NO.

Someone tells you you’re beautiful, what do you say?
Hmm.. I can't really say anything besides thanks, so most of the time I just smile

Do you ignore people when you’re mad/upset with them?

Has anyone said you have changed lately?
Yes! Got my braces off recently, thats why :)

Did anyone see you kiss the last person you kissed?

Do you get jealous easily?

Have you held hands with anyone in the past two weeks?

You’re bored, aren’t you?

Don’t tell me lies, so is the last person you texted attractive?
I have to admit, yes :)

Did you have a better day yesterday or today?
Yesterday. Definitely yesterday :)

Is anything bugging you right now?
OMGSH YES. ASSIGNMENTS + EXAMS this upcoming monday.

Do you believe everything happens for a reason?

Does anyone call you babe or baby, do you like it?
Yes I have been called that before. No, I don't really like it

What was your last thought before you went to bed last night?
YOU! haha :)

Last time you felt like punching someone?
Hmm.. a week ago maybe? Forgot

What’s on your mind lately?
Assignments, cbb-ness, and something else

What’s going on with you and the last person you kissed?
We don't talk to each other any more. We never see each other =/

Who was the last person to text you?
Richard :D

Are you happy with your life?
You could say that, I guess.

Do you hate the last guy you had a conversation with?


What were you doing this morning at three?