27 November 2010
"Pile your troubles on God's shoulders - he'll carry your load, he'll help you out. He'll never let good people topple into ruin."
- Psalm 55:22
"Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares about you"
- 1 Peter 5:7
"Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own"
- Matthew 6:34
Some bible quotes that have given me hope all these years. Its only now that I really need them to guide me at the moment, when everything seems to be falling apart. In the end, they make me smile :)
26 November 2010
Today was my last day of being a junior, next year will be my final last two years of high school as a senior :) Basically had a graduation mass and my mum came! she made my day because she said she'd try her hardest to come. I love you :) Cant believe im on holidays now, it seemed too fast :O this is my last holidays ever. next year is study, study, study and much less going out and definitely less socialising.
Today I bought my formal shoes - they look nice, and they dont even feel like heels, but its so uncomfortable, even just putting it on, because its crammed a little in the front =/ my mum seemed really determined to buy it though, seeing as my semi-formal is just 4 days away. and seeing as i really couldnt be bothered searching again for shoes on sunday, i agreed to it.
18 November 2010
What I really want to do is throw my phone onto the wall. Im so freaking tired of waiting. The phone has made me go depressed on my side of the relationship. We barely see each other, compared to when we used to see each other everyday. Maybe we both have resorted to texting each other to keep each other company instead of actually SEEING each other. Because of my phone, i get depressed every time i get short replies, long-time-to-reply replies, no i-love-you return replies or.. no reply at ALL. it really makes me sad. Im so glad hes different in real life.
i cant pretend everything is alright right now, because it isn't.
its getting harder to fake a smile..
oh and today i went with connie, kirsty and mim to the city to volunteer to donate blood. when we arrived there, we were told our school hadn't booked us in. fail. so in the end we had to head back home. we'll all have to wait until next year then.
i headed to work afterwards because connie reminded me that i had to get my laptop and school blazer that i left at work.
14 November 2010
12 November 2010
So tomorrow is Evie's semi-formal party and originally i couldnt go because i had work from 6-10pm but then my friend asked if she could get a lift to the party, because she has no other way.
I feel bad because:
1. Its my friends bday party
2. If i dont go, my friend wont be able to go
This afternoon i went to cancel my shift, and my manager was there so she wasnt exactly the perfect person to ask if i can cancel my shift, because as i expected, she pressures me by giving me that suspicious tone, and also asked me to replace it with another shift - and it ALWAYS happens to be a really unreasonable shift, and i cant say no :( and this 'unreasonable' shift happens to be on a sunday (a holy day) and 2-10pm!! ive NEVER worked 2-10 (7.5 hours) so im pretty much going to collapse from exhaustion on that day x.x
I go outside with the roster and start signing all my shifts and i notice on saturday, someone has already replaced me!! AHHH all that excuse for nothing :( if i just came to say i wanted to check my shifts, i couldve said no to that sunday shift D: anyway, i decided to work all of next week from monday to thursday. and on saturday..
09 November 2010
08 November 2010
I know how every senior above my year is going "YOU'LL BE FINE"
but no, im NOT fine, im freaking out so much! I mean, yeah, I did study quite a bit, especially in science. but the thing is, im worst in maths and i didnt study for maths. because seriously, i did try and as soon as i went on a maths online tutorial, i just freaked out more, so i closed the page and never looked at it again.
the things i do these days..
06 November 2010
Every holiday its the same.. go to Indonesia and always stick to my mum and dad and sis with no one else to talk to because no one can understand english :'( always so lonely.. hiks.. I wish I had friends that I could meet up with.. then I would enjoy my holidays.. I always wanted to watch a movie, eat out and ride electric scooter with friends overseas.. In fact, I wouldnt mind taking my boyfriend overseas with me - its only $1660.56 ^^ But honestly, my parents would kill me if i freely spent that much for someone :(
Hillsong Live Album Recording tomorrow :D The posters on it, are all around Kingsford on telephone poles - I never knew they wanted to promote it like that :L
Speaking of it, Richard is going with me and my mum. Nervous? Definitely. But its good for my parents (well, my mum at least..) to get to know my partner to the formal beforehand ^^ First time ive ever had my boyfriend meet one of my parents. Dont really know what to expect, but its my mum, and we had a conversation about this before so.. it should be okay-ish? :) Maybe a little awkward though.. haha.
My dad brought up the topic of my formal partner last night.. didnt turn out good, as I expected. I think most fathers all like that - scared of their daughter getting to know the 'opposite sex' and always concerned about the kinds of things we do with them - even hugging causes my dad to give me this full-blown lecture.. but I guess thats life. When the time comes, I pray my dad eventually approves of me having a boyfriend XD
Sometimes it takes another sibling to realise how bad someone's lifestyle is. Seeing my sister eating chips first thing in the morning really scares me. Shes also constantly eating lollies throughout the day. I guess I was like that when I was her age, and now I know why parents get concerned seeing their child eating those types of food..
05 November 2010
03 November 2010
My sister is going on camp for the first time tomorrow. Shes leaving at 6am in the morning. Hoping she stays safe but has heaps of fun. Surely the silence will kind of start to annoy me tomorrow.. haha.. Oh well. Will miss you heaps jess x
01 November 2010
First negative feeling as soon as I leave my house: insecurity.
Theres this old asian man across my road that is really scaring me because hes always looking in the direction of my house and his gaze is always following me.. and the first few days i passed him, he looked me up and down and wouldnt break off his gaze :'( Please, please dont get worse..