31 January 2011

Last Day of Summer Holidays!

Outing with Mr. Jeff Paz for dessert (Jessica Dusty was meant to go too, but she has school) :'(
Then dinner at Sunny's apartment with my church RDG :)

Good way to spend my last day.
Then tomorrow is the long awaited.. SCHOOL! in my new senior uniform! I really want to bring my mum's camera tomorrow. I want my senior year to be memorable from the VERY beginning. Only 2 years of high school left, girls! :)

Maybe I'll dedicate tomorrow's pictures to my cousin in Bandung - she's really interested in what high school is like in Australia, so maybe I'll even take a few shots of our group, and our new homeroom and all that, so don't mind me looking like a tourist ^^

30 January 2011

Stop getting my hopes up D: Hahaha.

I doubt it. I doubt it very much. You don't look the same way at me anymore, so I doubt it. Haha.


I haven't been on msn for ages, until recently. And I notice his message status hasn't been updated because I haven't seen him online since that time. I kinda like it the way it is.. He better not go online :(

Memories from 2010 New Year

Just thought I'd post this up for a smile :)

Female Response

I really can't believe that it's over
But I gotta accept the fact that it is
But before you're gone from my life forever
Theres something I gotta say
So just listen

Every time that we would fight
Every time you've made me cry
Does not compare to all the good times we've had
I thought you felt the same, but I was wrong
Next thing I know, you're leaving me here all alone

Each day I sit and wonder how'd things end so differently
Together we were beautiful and we were meant to be
But it's time to wake up, and shake off this sweet dream
Cause now our stories have new endings

Baby every night the tears roll down my face
Cause I should be your lady
All I want and need is your embrace (Come back to me)

When the music plays I'll be walking to a life that's missing you
And once the song has reached its last note
There's nothing in the world I can do

When I'm in my wedding dress
When I'm in my wedding dress
You're not standing next to me
When I'm in my wedding dress

Our memories still haunt me
Thoughts of me and you surround me
How can it be so easy for you to let me go?
I keep replaying all of the things you said
But I have no other choice except to move on like you

I can't imagine spending any day without you here
You came into my life, and suddenly you disappeared
Left me with nothing
But a heart broken in pieces
Before things really end, just hear me say

Baby every night the tears roll down my face
Cause I should be your lady
All I want and need is your embrace (Come back to me)

When the music plays I'll be walking to a life that's missing you
And once the song has reached its last note
There's nothing in the world I can do

When I'm in my wedding dress
When I'm in my wedding dress
You're not standing next to me
When I'm in my wedding dress

Though I know things will not change
Since you seem happy this way
Still I hope a part of me will always be with you
Because I know that deep inside my heart there's always a place for you..

29 January 2011

Liyisa's Bday Party

I had the best time there! It was the best way to end the summer holidays, and guess what? I ended up getting sunburnt.. hope this results in a tan :) :)

Basically summed up in points:
Dress ups. Centennial park. Hot sun. Cool shade. Hugs. SLR cameras. Guitar. Singing. Memories. Soccer. Pinata. Egg races. WATER GUN FIGHTS. Summer dresses. Presents. Rainbow cake. Laughter. Friends. Basketball. Card games. Dominos.

It really felt like summer on that day. Thanks Liyisa, for the awesome party that I'll never forget. HAPPY 16TH BIRTHDAY TO YOUUUUUU LOVELY!

"I just can't look, it's killing me"

The Killers - Mr Brightside

26 January 2011

Ahahah. lol.

Logged on to twitter. Someone's latest reblog also happens to be the same as one of my recent post's title :p

Australia Day Shopping

I felt girly / floral today so I went out with my mum to buy some clothes. Which is weird, because we're still shopping even if we came from Indo. My mum says its because the clothes there werent nice. Good point. Any to reason to shop right? Plus I KINDA needed the retail therapy.. if you get what I mean ;)

I got this white summer dress with silver prints on it, a singlet with floral loose frills on it, and this baby pink / peach semi-formal dress from forcast :) Expensive, but I gotta say, the formal wear there is REALLY good. There were at least 5 dresses that I liked - of course, they were all in the same colour though.. maybe thats the only reason why -__-"

Im happy, definitely happy. For now. Haha.
And afterwards we went to eat @ Pepper Lunch. It was my second time there I think? I stayed safe and ordered the same thing that I had last time :p brings back memories.. but meh.

24 January 2011

Quoting You

In the words of your blog: "They love you. They really do. And this is what you give them? An ignorance? Or a painful goodbye? I know it is your right to love someone else. But please gently let them go."

You've become that person to give me the ignorance and the painful goodbye.. why? :(

23 January 2011

What to dooo..

I dont understand why nearly everything contradicts each other. There this quote that says: "if you love him/her let them go, if they come back, thats how you know" - so basically this quote is saying, let them go if you love them. but THEN, theres quotes saying stuff like, well i dont know any really good famous ones, but basically they say just to hold on if you love them, and you're sure they're the one, because, well, you never know, its like 1 in a million chance, but waiting might just have a good outcome. You know, kinda proves you never really give up on someone. But.. anyway.. Its so hard to trust quotes these days, what I really need is Jesus. I want to base my life on what the bible says, not through quotes :(

21 January 2011


Im starting to like all these uni/college ads on the right side of facebook, they're really useful ^^ (not like as in facebook 'like') hha

19 January 2011

Far out..

now every song reminds us of what we used to be..
thats the reason im so sick of love songs, so tired of tears.. but why cant i turn off the radio? :(

For some stupid reason.. yup.. i downloaded a sad love song.. Where'd You Go by Fort Minor. I had this song ages ago but I deleted it because it has bad language in it.. and now its back on my iPod because it got stuck in my head after hearing it over and over on the radio in indonesia.. and now the lyrics arent helping me get over this.. such a sad song x.x

"It" still hasnt happened yet, because i want him to say those harsh words in real life (better than an online breakup). so im still in a relationship for now.. well not really if you think about it.. sigh.. i want to get it over and done with, but at the same time I want to avoid the day that he will say those words.. and at the same time, i dont want him to say them at all.. but as said before, its for the best.. sigh.. i gotta respect that. he still loves me. i still love him. its really hurt for both of us.. sigh, look at me now, im crying while writing these words.. what happened to being optimistic? haha.. XD i guess its all starting to come out now.. but i need to stay strong ^^" hey, he had no choice right? thank goodness it wasnt 'parting ways' because of him loosing feelings or finding another girl.. -sniffs- im greatful for what i have.. thanks God, for letting me experience true love at the very least.. :)

Super Late Goals T__T

Kill me if you want, but my christmas and nye wasnt as organised and exciting as it probably would have been, therefore I kind of never set goals for this new year.. yes, I know, shame on me -.-"

So this may feel kind of rushed, but here is my rough goals - procrastination is not one of them, because that goal, as I learnt, is virtually impossible for me.. dear God, please help me throw away this annoying habit =="

1. Stay single for this year + be HAPPY that I am!
yes, sooner than you think, me and him will be parting ways because.. well it really is for the best. It's good that were not parting because we don't love each other anymore, but because its for the best (he's going back to Indo for good). sigh. maybe i'll post about it later. well im basically saying it all here, arent i? hahaha XD but you won't see me depressed (as much, hopefully) because I'm trying super super SUPER hard to be strong and keep optimistic thoughts in my head.. its working so far.. XD its for a reason too, I want to show him that I'll be waiting for him with open arms when the time comes that he will be finished with studies and allowed to have a girlfriend again :) which will be years, I know. but i have hope. and hope is what motivates me to smile for what might and could happen ;) being a depressed girl will only make him less likely to want to be with me again, know what i mean? ^^ I'll give him a reason to come back.. hehe..

2. Soak in the Indonesian culture
Yup, this year I'm leaving my 3 years of chinese school for indoooo ;D it will help me soooo much - talking with family and relatives, the annual visit to the tropical country itself, and making connections with more indos :) but studying a language comes with practise. I'm exceptionally horrible with oral. I'm always too shy to practise my languages, because I know I will sound.. crap.. to begin with.. possibly even annoying, with my inaccurate fluency and pronunciations.. so anyway, this goal will involve having to talk to my parents in indo (T__T) and making more indo friends :D

thats it for now, two goals is waaay more than enough, and I dont even know if they are even my most important goals, i mean there should be one study goal at least.. but meh, im a lazy person :(

18 January 2011


Since the day that we met
I aint never had anyone make me feel this way
And my heart is sure it wants to be with you
Wanna give you the whole world
if you make the promise to me, you're going to stay
Without you guiding me, I'm lost and confused

What will it take to show you I'll be by your side
Boy, I got you and I want to give you what you never had
Everyday I hope to make you a part of my life
cause you know me and I know you
Boy your love is where it's at

I'm gonna be the love that's gonna last
And be the one that's got your back
Aint nothing never that bad that we could be together
And though we both made our mistakes
And some we never wished we made
But we'll be okay if we just stay together

I know she left you stranded
And you paid the price when you messed up your life
Boy I know you're so afraid but I can't write the wrongs that she did

Baby you're the one I'm waiting for
Because you give me what I need and more..

I'm gonna be the love that's gonna last
And be the one that's got your back
Aint nothing never that bad that we could be together
And though we both made our mistakes
And some we never wished we made
But we'll be okay if we just stay together..

This song is dedicated to you.. you know who you are..
When you leave here, please dont forget to take 'us' with you, dont leave 'us' behind for me to be the only one to go through our places of memories alone.. please, for me? :)

13 January 2011

My adventure so far..

So a lot of you have been asking how its going in Indonesia. Honestly? Well its half half. Purwokerto was pretty awesome for a while because we had the usual big family gathering, and it makes me all happy :)the disappointment was that people started leaving halfway.. and thats never happened before.. so i experienced a kind of loneliness for the first time XD I didn't get to talk to my cousin, Andre, as much and I also couldnt go with him to the nye party with his friends, but thats okay, theres always next time ^^ My other cousin Adit has changed quite a lot - both in appearance and personality. He smiles at me more and it makes me think that hes more comfortable around me, which is good, no more complete awkwardness x) Okay, umm.. next was Bandung. Last time I went there was around 8 years ago? Anyway. It. was. the. BEST. At first I was really hesitant because I remember my last visit wasnt as pleasant, but how wrong I was. Bandung is even more modern than Jakarta, and the architecture is amazing. But my absolute highlight? Finally getting to know my cousin, Bella, who got the courage to practise her english with me :D Before that, we NEVER talked, so it was really awkward and I felt really uncomfortable, because besides that, she was.. really pretty. You could say I was intimidated XD and now? shes one of the most down to earth people and I really look up to her. Her way of thinking is.. wow. She really has a will to study and all that. Hmm.. on one of my last days there, she invited me to her church. Amazingly, it was just like Hillsong. But better ;D it wasnt completely fancy, but I really liked it better that way. Everyone was extremely friendly and welcoming. I guess that was because I was from overseas and couldnt speak indo XD It was really amusing when people came up to me and attempted to speak English =) Well I made many new friends on that day. Hmm.. where do I stand now? Its back to Jakarta, where its not so great.. no cousins, hot weather, long distance to decent shopping malls.. where do I stop? haha. Well thats my holiday summed up in a blog =)Hope you all are enjoying your holidays - wish I was there XD